I have my annual performance evaluation at work tomorrow.

Normally I would be nervous about that.  I was always one of those kids who put a lot of pressure on herself to achieve, to, along the lines of Dooce, be valedictorian of everything.  One of my greatest disappointments in life is that not every activity I do gives out congratulatory plaques.

Anyway, I have a new boss this time around, so I’m not sure what her evaluation style will be.  In these tough times, it’s pretty important for higher-ups to perceive me as valuable.  We haven’t had any layoffs yet, but it’s not totally out of the question, and since I’m only part time it might be easy to trim me off.

However, I’m really not nervous about it at all.  It was supposed to be today, but then it got rescheduled for tomorrow due to a conflict, and I didn’t even feel any particular relief when I noticed I’m off the hook today.

Miles has his first real fever.  He woke up this morning a little out of it, and Jessa, his care provider, called me around 10:30 to tell me he was hot and not doing so well.  I scrambled home, took his temperature (102.2F), and got him a last-minute doctor’s appointment (verdict:  ears and lungs are clear; keep him on Tylenol and ibuprofen and bring him back if the fever doesn’t get better).

He spent the rest of the afternoon sleeping fitfully in my arms, the poor little guy.  Last night was a little rough, though really not worse than recent nights.  We thought he was getting a molar, which may still be the case, but maybe this illness was brewing up in him too over the last several.  Last night, although he woke frequently, he was pretty happy to go back to sleep snuggled up on Denny’s or my chest.

I haven’t taken his temperature yet, but he feels significantly cooler this morning.

I just don’t really care about my performance evaluation, because my Little Scoop isn’t right.  I can’t focus on anything else.  As I was telling Denny yesterday, I am a total baby when I’m sick, but I would one hundred times rather be the one with the fever right now.  The clichés come true, I guess.  I don’t know how parents of seriously ill children get through the days.