11/22/2014

The Tobin Times #39

Filed under: — Aprille @ 3:50 pm

My dearest Tobin,

Times, they are a-changing.  This has been a major month in terms of your personal development.  As I may have mentioned last month, we did a weekend-long potty bootcamp, and it works pretty darn well.  That weekend had a fairly large number of accidents, then somewhat fewer the next week, and fewer the week after that, and now I’d say you’re reliably potty trained.  You still wear a pull-up at night, and at the moment you’re about 50/50 in terms of keeping it dry overnight.  Still, though, that qualifies you for preschool.

Our plan was to get you started at Willowwind at least a month before Little Potato’s birth, so you could get established in your routine there before the major change happens on the homefront.  That seems like it’s going to work out fine.  We visited there last week, and while you were a touch apprehensive, you got very interested in some of the Montessori works (especially the “potion,” which involves pouring colored water back and forth between containers).  It helped that you saw your old friend Digger Ben, who isn’t in your class but with whom you will have recess sometimes.  You also saw Craig, the grandpa of some kids we know from Miles’s time at Willowwind, who is a volunteer story reader for the preschool classes.

We came home and had lunch, and afterward you asked, “Can you drive me back to Willowwind so I can do more potions?”  We had to settle for a homemade approximation.  It really made me smile that you wanted so much to go back.  As long as they haven’t rotated the potions work out by the time you formally enroll, I think we’re golden.

As I was considering the prospect of enrolling you, a not-so-small part of me was thinking, “Oh, let’s just keep him home one more semester.  I’m going to miss him.”  I will absolutely miss you, but it will also be really nice to know that you’ll be doing fun and interesting activities at school while I’m taking care of a tiny newborn (and taking advantage of morning nap opportunities).  Let’s face it:  if you were home, you’d be watching videos.  And knowing you, you wouldn’t be content to sit still and watch a video for long.  You’d be watching ten minutes of a video, then wanting to do something else, which would leave very little time for the rest/nursing/diaper changing/laundry/walking around making silly noises cycle that comes with a tiny baby.

I was just telling your dad what a great gift it is that you and Miles have been playing together so well lately.  You’ve been playing school, Minecraft (not the app version, but a play-acting version you guys invented that involves Bristle Block swords and shovels), and other made-up games.  A couple of minutes ago, Miles came up and told me about something involving Lego races.  You were excited that you won a silver coin, which I’m pretty sure Miles pilfered from your dad’s change jar.  Not only am I thrilled that you guys are getting along and using your imaginations, but it’s going to be a huge help after Little Potato’s birth.

I hope you like him as much in practice as you do in theory.  You’ve been wanting to look at a lot of pictures and videos of yourself as a baby, including a super-cute one I just saw of you making ecstatic noises about blueberry puree.  You often say, “I love babies.”  We’ve been talking a lot about what it means to be a big brother.  Although I hope to continue the pregnancy into January, it’s possible that this is your last month as the baby of the family.  That’s kind of hard to fathom, but it’s also pretty cool to see you settle into a more mature lifestyle.

Not every moment has been easy.  You’ve had some serious tantrums lately, including one a couple of nights ago when your dad dared to put lotion on your dry skin.  It was bedtime, and being tired surely didn’t help things.  You screamed and howled, and there can’t have been more than five seconds of quiet before your sobs morphed into snores.  Then you had a good night’s sleep and felt fine in the morning.

Despite the rosy picture I painted above of you and Miles getting along so well, we’ve also had some trouble with you being too physical with him.  Your dad thinks it’s the Spider-man books and videos, which may be the case.  Sometimes your pretend web-slinging becomes more like punching, which is definitely not a habit we want to encourage.  The good news is that you’re becoming more responsive to punishment.  We don’t like yelling at you, but sometimes it’s the only thing that works.  It’s hard to see you get so sad, but hitting is not an option for us, either in terms of your behavior or our discipline strategy.  Your dad has been taking to your room and putting you in your chair for a time-out, and that seems to be reasonably effective.  Here’s to hoping you get the message and don’t get aggressive with another kid who wants to use the Willowwind potions.

Your current favorites:  weird British cartoons (the Octonauts, Where’s Wally, the Numberjacks), playing with Miles, earning potty success stickers, messing around with really expensive musical instruments while Miles is at his piano lessons, Play-Doh, playing with your Imaginext toys, licking my arms (sigh), preparing pretend food.  Last night you made me about fifteen pizzas, all of which were pepperoni-tacos-mushroom-veggies.  You also like to play with the toy stove Mubby got you, as well as helping out with real kitchen tasks.

Photo by Gary Clarke

We had a small snowfall last weekend, and you were so excited to get your Grand-shovel out, which is what you call the shovel Skittergramps got you.  You and your dad got our sidewalk and driveway cleared, but you didn’t want to stop, so you guys cleared the walks of some elderly neighbors.  Dr. Abadhi caught you in the act, and you earned your first dollar.  You were very proud and spent it on sour gummy worms.  You even shared them with Miles.

I really appreciate how receptive you’ve been to our nudges over the last month, Tobin.  You’re a smart, ambitious kid, and I know you’re ready to handle these new challenges that await you.  I’m still glad you’re only going to preschool half-time, though.  I’m not quite ready to send you off full-time yet.  Besides, if you were at school all day, I’d have no excuse to figure out exactly what the heck Numberjacks are.

With love as you charge confidently forward,

Mommy

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