Dear Tobin,

Another month has gone by, and you’re continuing your usual patterns of being happy, energetic, and funny. I can always count on you for a smile, and while I know it’s been hard on you to be physically separated from your friends, your sunny disposition has mostly prevailed. You do “lunch bunch” social events once a month with your classmates, during which you set up your computer at the lunch table and chat while you eat. I cringe every time you do it, because you’ve been using your dad’s nice laptop rather than your glacial school-issued computer, and I am afraid it’s going to get coated with bread crumbs or sloshed with lemonade. It hasn’t happened yet, but you are awfully wiggly, so we’ll have to make sure to set it a good distance from your food and beverage.

For the time being, you’ve occupied the new downstairs space as your work area. You and your dad have been talking about swapping. He’s currently set up in the guest bedroom, which is a lot tighter quarters. Still, of the two of you, you’re the one who’s more likely to break into a spontaneous dance, so maybe more space suits you. You’ve been doing great in school. Every time your teacher sends an update, you’re always checking all the boxes in terms of participation and completion of work. We have your conference in a couple of weeks, and it will be interesting to see how your teacher describes your experience. We already know her, as she was Miles’s sixth grade teacher last year, and I think she’s well-suited to online teaching. She’s young and competent with technology, and even more important, she’s flexible and laid-back. Those are important qualities in a teacher who’s having to approach school in a whole new way. I hope you mostly use your energy and humor in a way that makes her day better and not more challenging.

Halloween was weird but still fun. You got to see your school friend Ben at an outdoor trunk-or-treat sponsored by volunteers from your dad’s workplace. Your dad and Ben’s dad work for the same organization, so it’s been easy to coordinate some time with him. You and Ben have had some online gaming hangouts, too.

We also organized a candy hunt in the park for neighborhood kids, and even though it got more crowded than I wish it had, the kids were great about wearing masks. It was a beautiful day, with a nice breeze, and everyone had fun. We didn’t do any trick-or-treating, but you still got lots of candy. Your costume, which I made with plenty of guidance for you, was The Prowler. I wasn’t familiar with that character, but you tell me it’s a villain from Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse. I’m pretty sure you and your brothers watched that on the iPad during our interminable drive home from the Florida Keys last spring, but the details are all a blur. In any case, you were happy with your costume and overall had a good time.

I feel like I use the word outrageous a lot when describing the hair of my children, and that adjective is suiting you better all the time. It has gotten to the point where it gets in your face and makes it hard for you to see your computer screen, so you let me put it in a funny ponytail on top of your head. It reminded us of the titular character from Robert Munsch’s Stephanie’s Ponytail. Much like Stephanie, you are a leader and not a follower. I’m sure if you went to school with your silly ponytail, you would shrug off any teasing you might receive and probably start a new trend.

I sent the above photo to Mubby and Skitter, and they both remarked that you looked just like me when I was a kid. I don’t remember if I ever wore a hairstyle like that, but it seems plausible.

In lieu of official school pictures, you and your brothers and I went out to the park and shot some portraits by the rocks at the park. We’ve had some lovely days this fall, so park time (and leaf-raking time) have been a big part of many of your days. You even mowed the lawn once. Today at lunch, you told me that you were feeling frustrated that you’re not saving up for anything in particular right now, because you like pestering your dad and me to assign you chores to earn money. I don’t know what a lawn-mow goes for these days, but if you keep it up next summer, you might get some real bank.

Our lawn is currently a muddy mess. The construction project on our house is pretty much complete, and a landscaping company came and spread out dirt and cast grass seed. It’s been cold and rainy ever since, so I don’t know how well it will take. You may get a series of easy mowing jobs next summer if the yard stays as barren as it is now.

Your current favorites: cinnamon toast, tortilla chips, making lists of your favorite animals in many different categories, YouTube videos, Minecraft, the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books (both physical books and audiobooks), taking long showers, jumping out of your chair and dancing during dinner, and making everybody laugh.

You’re a lion’s roar of a person, Tobin, and I admire how well you’ve adapted to our strange new life. With the promising COVID-19 vaccines on the horizon, it’s nice to know there are probably days coming when you can get back to your friends, but I admit I’ve loved having extra time with you. Even though you wear me out with your energy and nonstop chatter, it’s the kind of worn-out that feels satisfying, not draining.

(Sometimes it’s a little draining, but there’s nobody I’d rather have draining me than you.)

Love,

Mom