Dear Tobin,

I made the mistake of buying you a pack of socks that are not all the same color. I bought you new socks because yours were getting worn out, and socks are the one item of clothing you’ll change without prompting. You really like the new socks, but you don’t care at all whether the socks you’re wearing match or not. That, combined with your spotty record on getting them into the laundry hamper when you take them off, means that your feet are almost always silly looking. I do my best to pair them up when I fold laundry, but as another person who questions the value of matching socks, I don’t get too upset when it doesn’t work out.

That’s you, Tobin: you’re flexible, easy to please, and always ready for an adventure. Your spring break this year wasn’t especially adventurous, but you did manage to get out of town. Because you didn’t get any no-parents time with Mubby and Skitter last summer, they invited you and Miles (and Callum, who declined) to spend the week with them. We dropped you off the first weekend, you spent the week, and they brought you home the following weekend. Skitter seemed worried that you were bored, and it’s true that you didn’t get to do the usual list of activities you enjoy there. Also, the weather wasn’t very good most of the week, so outdoor time was limited. You and Miles and your grandparents did play a lot of poker (though the royal flush remains elusive), and I know you ran around outside and shot baskets. You and Mubby made it out to Brookside Park at least once, too. I tried to reassure Skitter that you were probably no more bored there than here, since you had all your favorite electronics, and at least at their house you got all the treats you could want. You and Miles never complained, and really, you haven’t complained much at all throughout this whole ordeal.

Although I was happy you got to spend some special time with your grandparents, I missed you more than I ever remember missing you in past years. I think all the time we’ve spent together over the past year has gotten me accustomed to always having you nearby, and it was a shock to my system not to hear you laughing to yourself as you watch your favorite anime shows or to see you running around the dining room when normal people are sitting at the dinner table.

You started virtual ELP today, which you said you enjoyed. One of the challenges of online school is that the teachers have reduced ability to tailor instruction and content to individual students’ needs.  Your ELP teacher (who was also Miles’s ELP teacher) indicated that for the rest of this online school year, you’ll have private weekly sessions with her. Once the school year starts next year, we hope and expect that you’ll attend in person, and then you’ll be in a small group. I’m sure you’ll prefer that, since you’re a social person anyway, and I remember hanging out with my classmates being the best part of ELP from my youth. Still, I admire the commitment of the school district to continue to provide services to you even when it’s not convenient. Your teacher sent a variety of topics and let you choose, and you said that you were interested in almost all of them. You were excited because almost all of them had to do with biology in one way or another, and learning about animals is your favorite. I think you settled on aquarium management for your first topic. Watch this space to see if we end up with an aquarium. I’d probably rather get everybody vaccinated and take a trip to Shedd Aquarium in Chicago, but we’ll see how it pans out.

I recently found the photo above, an old one your dad posted on Instagram that I had forgotten about. You were always a little sweetheart, but that picture really captures your cherubic curls, little nose, and soft cheeks. Your dirty fingernails show that you were always a lover of playing outside. You still have a lot of those attributes, but it highlights what a true kid you are, no longer a little pup. Thankfully, you still let me hug you pretty often. You don’t seek out my snuggles so much anymore, but you are indulgent and don’t run away when I wrap you up in my arms. I appreciate it. Plus you got a really soft new sweatshirt, and it makes you extra squishy. You don’t have much baby fat left, so a fluffy sweatshirt helps me reminisce about your more tender days.

Your current favorites: Club crackers, tortilla chips, your neon green sweatshirt, watching anime on the iPad, hanging out in your “office” (aka the spare bedroom that has become your personal computing/schooling station), and being outside. We’ve had a few lovely days over the last month, and when you saw me relaxing out on the balcony on one of those evenings, you came out and joined me. It was really nice to have some quiet time with you, since you’re not usually a quiet kind of guy.

You’re more of a mismatched socks kind of guy. You’re comfortable with a little imbalance. That’s good for all of us.

Love,

Mom