I am socially awkward.
At what distance are you supposed to do the “acquaintance smile”? I’m talking about when you’re walking in a public place, and someone you kind of know but not really is approaching. It would be polite to smile or say hi or acknowledge the person somehow, but when do you do it?
That happened to me the other day. I saw this guy, friend-of-a-friend, we’ve been at the same parties but never really had any one-on-one conversations or anything. I noticed him from probably half a block away, and I planned to acknowledge him pleasantly at a distance of around 10 feet. I looked around at other stuff until I got to the 10-foot mark, at which point I looked up. However, at that point he was looking around at other stuff.
Did I miss the moment? Was he looking at me, ready to be pleasant, at 15 feet, then assumed I either didn’t see him or was too stuck-up to say anything because I was looking at other stuff? Or is HE the one who’s stuck up and he totally dissed me?
This sort of thing happens to me a lot, and I think maybe I just wait too long for the contact. It’s weird if you do it too soon, though, because then you’re walking toward each other for so long, looking at each other, and there’s too much build-up for such a small interaction.
There really needs to be some kind of rule book for this sort of thing.
I always felt like this was particularly a problem going jogging at a regular time…the people you pass are the same people, so they start out strangers and then become familiar…but you see them coming like 3 blocks away and then have to pretend like you didn’t *really* see them until they’re right in front of you and you’re like “OH hi :)”
I completely agree. I need that handbook!
As soon as I see someone I know, I stare at them until they see me, then I wave and smile. Otherwise, you get the situation you describe above.
I’ve passed Arlen Lawson a couple of times where he saw me before I saw him because I was looking at my feet and my head shot up when I saw someone flipping me off and it was him, and then we said hi. So there’s one way of doing it.
I just spent more time reading this than I’ve ever spent actually thinking about the issue on my own. I guess because I’ve conditioned myself to be a friendly, outgoing person (I am not this way by nature). So I talk and say hello to EVERYBODY. I’m sure I annoy some people or make them feel uncomfortable but I don’t really care. I made myself this way on purpose and I definitely find that I get more joy out of life this way. I’ll never go back. Never.