Dear Miles,

One of my favorite sources for affordable-yet-stylish kids’ clothes, Crazy 8, is going out of business.  They always have good deals on jeans, so I bought a bunch for you and your brothers in as-of-yet too-big sizes.  You currently wear a twelve, which is what you need for length, but thank goodness for adjustable waists.  I got a pair of size fourteen jeans for you, then I figured you are unlikely to shrink, so I bought two pairs of size sixteen.  Sixteen.  I know it doesn’t exactly correlate with age, but it was blowing my mind that you’re only two jeans sizes away from everything that age range brings.

That reminded me of your very first pair of jeans, which you wore to an Oscar party when you were just six weeks old.  We didn’t stay long at that party, but we were excited to show you off to friends, and you looked so cute in your tiny jeans.

February 28, 2008.  Photo by Denny.

Nowadays, we can stay late at parties.  Last weekend we attended a birthday party that was geared toward adults but at which kids were welcome, and you and your brothers did great.  You didn’t do a lot of dancing, but you commented several times afterward how much fun it was.  You made a little cave among chairs, and even though I thought it was a weird thing to do, you seemed very happy there.  You invited Callum in to play with you, and you guys apparently had a lot of fun.  The open bar blew your mind—you got a hot chocolate AND a lemonade.  I guess that’s how you managed to stay up till 11:30.

You’ve continued your work as Mister Whacky on your YouTube channel.  Your most recent edition was a taste-test of unusual sodas, and as always, you included your brothers very kindly.  You realize that their presence adds a certain variety and appeal, and I think it speaks to your maturity that you can embrace the big picture and overall quality of your videos rather than needing to be the star all the time.

We had your parent-teacher conference earlier this week, and your teacher had nothing but good things to say about you.  In fact, he even praised your improvements in personal organization, both with physical materials and internal tasks.  You’re doing great academically, which is great, but the comment from your teacher that made me the most proud had to do with your social interactions.  He said that you have your usual preferred classmates for group work, but if a student is having a hard time handling a situation, he can trust you to work with that kid.  He said you’re always willing to take on that challenge and that you’re kind and respectful even when it’s not easy.

Honestly, you’re usually that way at home these days too.  Of course you have your moments of frustration, especially when your brothers are annoying, but overall things have been going well.  I see you employing strategies that serve your own happiness while not being a total jerk to others.  For example, you have a sign on your bedroom door that asks visitors to knock.  Callum likes to barge in.  He can’t read yet, but you’ve done a good job explaining the sign to him, and when he comes in without knocking, you send him back out and reiterate the knocking requirement.  Then, crucially, when he does knock, you reinforce that behavior by letting him in and being friendly to him.  It’s part two that’s tough, and you have been doing it without any direction from your dad or me.

Music is still one of your favorite pastimes.  You are doing great in band, Family Folk Machine, Mighty Hawk Singers, piano, and Orff Club.  I catch you singing around the house all the time, and you love to wear the trombone-themed shirts you got for Christmas.  You recently got your black ribbon in band (the highest achievement), and you’re moving on to the next level of trombone music.  I also heard you playing from a book of movie-themes arranged for trombone that you got for Christmas.  I wondered when I got it for you whether it was too advanced, but you are ready for the challenge.

Your current favorites:  pasta, Minecraft, YouTube (watching, creating, and video editing), washing your glorious hair, jumping at the trampoline park, and everything music-related.

Photo by Gary Clarke

I remember the day you were born, talking to our wonderful doula Monica, speculating about the person you would become.  You were so tiny then you wouldn’t have fit into those newborn-size jeans.  It’s been such a pleasure watching you find out what you love and thrive in those areas.  Your new jeans are as long as your trombone slide, and you fit perfectly—maybe not quite yet into the size sixteens, but you’ll find your way.

Love,

Mom