Stuff My People Say, late 2020-early 2021
April 10, 2021
—
Callum and I were cozy on the couch together this morning, and I was scrolling through YouTube workout videos to figure out which one I wanted to do later.
Callum: I feel…that this is a cuddle moment, not a workout moment.
April 7, 2021
—
“Imagine you exist your entire life without closing your mouth.” -Callum
April 4, 2021
—
Callum is interested in the word “ain’t” but he isn’t very good at it. He wanted to play Wii bowling earlier, and I said we could if his dad wasn’t using the TV.
“If he’s watching basketball, we ain’t cannot gonna do it.”
March 24, 2021
—
Callum is having his first Pop Tart and is telling his teacher about it. He assumes that she, too, is brand new to Pop Tarts.
“It’s this rectangle…and it has frosting and sprinkles on it…and–THIS IS WEIRD–you put it in the TOASTER to make it warm!”
March 16, 2021
—
A joke from Callum:
Q: What do you call an artist that uses cards instead?
A: A CARD-ist.
March 3, 2021
—
I was helping Callum put socks on so we could play outside on this beautiful afternoon. The toe part was a little crooked. Of note: he’s been interested in sarcasm lately and has been asking about it.
C: Oh nooooo! It’s the end of the wooooorld!
A: Ah, that’s sarcasm. It’s when you say something but people can tell by your tone that you mean the opposite.
C: No, it’s called DRAMA.
March 2, 2021
—
Callum, over his bedtime snack Cheerios: “It’s weird how ‘delicious’ means good, because ‘de-‘ means undo.”
February 21, 2021
—
Callum came into our room during the night, so he was with us when we woke up this morning.
C (lifting his head, eyes wide open): Uh…buh?
A: What?
C: I thought you said, “What are some letter sounds?”
Then he told me several more.
February 18, 2021
—
Callum and I usually do his science projects in the afternoon, but we had some extra time this morning, so I opened the assignment to get an idea of what we’d be doing.
Callum disapproved. “I don’t want spoilers, Mom.”
January 20, 2021
—
“Even *I* wouldn’t do that.” —Tobin, who is historically a bit of a sore loser at board games, in a discussion of sportsmanship and grace in light of recent events.
December 18, 2020
—
A: We should make a list of movies we want to watch over break. I’ve been wanting to see Emmet Otter again.
T: Emmet Otter…?
A: Emmet Otter’s Jugband Christmas?
T: OOOH! The one with all the otters?
December 11, 2020
—
A: I have an SP (Simulated Patient) job today, so don’t worry if you hear me moaning and crying. I’m just pretending.
T: But how will I know if you really need me?
A: I’ll say, “Tobin, help!”
T: But what if your medical student is named Tobin?
He was mostly kidding, but he’s also a sweetie.
Leave a Reply