Dear Callum,

Now, more than a week has passed since your eighth birthday. You’ve surpassed the age your oldest sibling was when you were born, so this is the first time in fifteen years that I haven’t had a kid under eight years old. You’re straddling the line between big kid and little kid. You want to be included in everything your older siblings do, but you also have the self-awareness to leave the room when the T-Rex scene gets a little intense in Jurassic Park. I never would have let our first eight-year-old watch Jurassic Park, but I guess that’s the advantage of being third-born.

Your personality is an interesting one: sometimes you seem timid and tender-hearted, and other times you bash Tobin repeatedly with toy swords. This is why I don’t like to buy you toy swords. You’re getting braver and braver, and all the new opportunities you’re getting through school and activities are helping you branch out. You’ll be starting on your first basketball team next week, and it will be interesting to see how that goes.

The most notable aspect of your development in the last year has been your wit. You are a kid who cracks us up all the time. Almost every day, you come up with some hilarious retort, and the outsized vocabulary that comes out of your 29th percentile body makes you all the funnier. Recently your dad was goofing around with you as he helped you get ready for bed, and he was calling you silly names like “Billy Bob McGillicuddy.” You gave him a slow-burn stare and said, “I don’t think you’re my dad if you don’t know my name.”

I wonder if it’s common for comedians to be later-born kids in their families, because you get plenty of practice honing your zingers during the nightly dinner table conversations with your siblings. I often post your quotes on Facebook, and 0ne of my friends describes you as his “favorite Internet personality.” You also decided to start doing DuoLingo to learn Spanish, and you are so proud of yourself when you surprise me with new word knowledge. The world will have to brace itself to hear your commentary in multiple languages.

You had a fun holiday and birthday season, filled with thousands of treats, presents, and time with family. We ended up spending a whole week in Ames, because bad weather in Minnesota prevented Suzy and Joe from arriving when we they had originally planned. We only had to adjust our schedule slightly, and your dad was able to work remotely while you and your siblings basked in the sugar-laden environment that is Mubby and Skitter’s house. You played a lot of games, went ice skating twice, and prepared a special magic show. You got a magic kit for Christmas at our house, so you and Artemis took advantage of your time off to plan and rehearse an extensive presentation. You guessed a number an audience member (Tobin) chose, magically released knots from a rope, extracted that rope from my ear, and disappeared behind a blanket. You and Art had a lot of fun doing it, and we all were very impressed.

For your birthday, we kept things mostly calm. It fell during winter break this year, which is an awkward time to try to get together with friends, but we had a nice family party. We all went to Defy trampoline park and boing-boing-boinged, and you and Tobin made the special New York style pizza that has become a family favorite. You also got to choose our take-out dinner. Your choice was Z’Mariks, and your selected entrée was cavatappi pasta with tomato sauce. Instead of a cake, you chose a big chocolate chip cookie, and of course I put up balloons and sparkly number eight to commemorate the day.

You’re excited to try all kinds of things, from blowing Skitter’s cornet to the school spelling bee, which will be coming in the spring. I admire your adventurous spirit. The pandemic has limited your opportunities over the last couple of years, but you’re getting more and more chances now to discover new interests. Any time anyone runs an errand or goes anywhere, you want to come along. You haven’t spent much time in the retail space lately, so a recent trip to Walgreens to get batteries for a birthday gift was a big deal for you. You were amazed by the snacks, beverages, and Chapstick.

Your current favorites: meat of all kinds, but especially chicken wings; Manchego cheese; watching YouTube; playing with your school friends; pizza; the Humphrey and Og book series by Betty Birney; working on Spanish and trying out your new words on me; all the special events that happen at school, like pajama days and when your friends sang Happy Birthday to you; and our cuddly, cozy bedtime routine. You like to have your water bottle, whatever stuffed animal you love most at the moment (currently Og the Frog, a birthday gift from Suzy and Joe), and stories. We usually read a chapter from a long book, but you also like to get shorter books from the school library. We recently read one about Wisconsin. You like Wisconsin because we went there on a family trip once and you met a nice donkey.

Callum, you are smart, fun, sweet, and adventurous. You have an interesting perspective, and you often make me think about things in new ways. I love you so much. Eight is great, especially when the eight-year-old is you.

Love,

Mom